Children in group are a blessing but also add complexity to healthy group meetings.
We are a family, and one of the joys of doing Community Group is not just adults connecting, but our whole families building friendships together.
If this is a tension for you, consider these 3 tips and 1 of the Childcare options below:
3 Childcare Tips:
1. Assign A Childcare Coordinator
Usually this is a parent who’s really organized! It’s not his or her job to do all the childcare, just to keep it organized.
The goal is always for the entire group to be sharing the load of caring well for the children.
2. Make House Rules Wherever You Meet
Talk with the host(s) regularly about this. If you rotate homes then each new home has a new set of house rules.
Some people don’t want children in the bedrooms, while others don’t care.
Communicate clearly the expectations to all the children and parents as well as whoever is caring for the kids.
3. Ensure Safety of Children
When sharing childcare among your group, having 2 adults present at all times with kids, ensures accountability and safety for children.
Have parents take their own kids to the bathroom and change their own kids diapers, instead of a childcare person.
Have childcare take place in a room with windows and that is more public.
7 Childcare Options:
1. Rotate Between Men's, Women's, & All-Together Nights
Groups that do a 3 week rotation, only need to provide childcare 1 out of every 3 weeks, on the nights the whole group meets together.
On the men's and women's nights, families take care of their own childcare.
It’s important you regularly do whole family times (men, women, children) to maintain connection with everyone.
2. Take Turns Caring For Children
Part of being in community is sharing the load of childcare, even for group members with out children.
Rotate between 2 men and 2 women from your group.
Instead of assigning a couple to do childcare, having 2 men or 2 women, gives those 2 people a chance to connect.
Having 2 adults also ensures accountability and safety for the children in that they are not left alone with 1 adult.
3. Hire A Sitter to Watch The Children
Often this could be teenagers.
It’s important to explain expectations to them and make clear any house rules.
EVERYONE should help finance this – even those without kids because we are all making this possible:
Group members can Venmo or give a cash donation to help cover expenses
If there isn’t enough cash coming in, then bring it up and challenge the group (not just those with children) to do more.
If you have more than enough, just keep the extra for future weeks.
4. Ask A Responsible Older Sibling From The Group
Everything from option #3 usually applies, though you might pay them less.
This can lead to tension if there are problems with their performance but deal with it directly.
For safety, it is wise to have 2 responsible sitters in the room with the kids at all times.
5. Take An Offering For Home Baby Sitters
If just 1 or 2 families in your small group have children you can decide to make donations each trimester to help them care for the expense of hiring a sitter in their home.
It’s unrealistic for most families to absorb the full expense on their own – but in some cases this is a good option as long as you are dealing with just 1 or maybe 2 families.
6. Have Childcare In A Different Home Nearby
This can often be a good option if you can arrange it for children that have trouble leaving their parents alone or if you have a LOT of kids.
Give the sitters everyone’s cell numbers or the number for the host home and if there’s a problem Mom or Dad are just a call away!
This can really work well with 2 groups that might share a sitting home.
7. Don’t Do Any Childcare
If everyone in your group has free childcare available (family, older kids), then these groups can leave their children at home when they meet each week.
Some groups don’t do childcare because everyone in the group has children that are older or perhaps the group is made up of single adults without children or young married couples with no children yet.
But once children are involved it is important that you make a plan that makes it possible for these people to be involved with your small group.
How Can We Help You?
How is your group going? Are there any challenges or issues you or your group are struggling with? Reach out to your coach to setup a meeting. We'd love to help!